Jeb: wut a dae

mah pee iz purpil. haz thet hapind tu aneewun els? thu peepul givin me thu medissin fer tu tri sed thet thet wuz varee intrusting an tu lit thim no ef it turnd anee diffrunt culurz. thin agin it mite hev ben al thu skitulz i bin eetin. butt i ownlee lahk thu gren wunz so thet dont mayk no sins eethur.

aftur wurk i startid wurkin on mah noo burd hows. sum peepul arownd heer tri tu mayk skairkroz tu keepe thu kroz uway (an i wuz wun fur ubowt too sumerz butt thet iz a storee fer latur), butt I liyk tu bild burd howsiz fer thim. I mayk thim big and fansee. owtsiyd thu hows i putt a litul portch with portch furnichur an all. i liyk tu think uv thim liyk a litul mareed cuppul an wutnot. Thay wood bee sitin on thu porch havvin a snak an talkin bout there dae. i eevin hav a litul playt thet i putt burd sede kookeez on an a big ol pitchir thet i putt watur in butt i preeten its lemminaid.

yup, i lahk tu sit on mah portch an wach the litul ol mistur an missuz kro on thair portch az thu sun sits beehine mah corn feeldz. thay tahlk ubowt how mutch corn thay dun stol frum owt mah feeldz an abowt how mad ol jeb got win thay krapt on hiz pikup. thay laff an laff abowt thet. Mah how thay laff. thay laff untill wun dae mebee its thu heet or mebee missuz kro ketchez mistur kro with sum yung hussie butt thiss dae thu laffin stahps cuz missuz kro putts antyfreez in thu lemminaid an rat poyzun in thu burd sede kookeez. its wun uv them thair mirdir sooisidz. an thin its ol jeb hoo laffs. Mah how i laffs.

i nevur sed i lahk kroz. i jis dont kair fer skairkroz.